Dear Sirs:
Thank you for your recent job offer. You’ll enjoy my direct, no-nonsense approach to my work beginning right now. My experience with my previous employer’s collapse compels me to ask a few quick questions about your business to qualify your offer.
1. Is your accounting department encouraged to be “creative?”
2. Have you stolen company or [...]
Entries Tagged as 'funny'
Job counteroffer? Why not?
April 30th, 2009 · 3 Comments · Finding a job, Humor
Tags:finding a job·funny·money
Instructions For The Newly Unemployed
February 24th, 2009 · No Comments · Humor
Was your company failure unjust? Did you get the shaft? Too bad. Hop off your pity pot and get something to do. These suggestions are economical and will help you detox from the adrenaline of your high-powered past.
Watch birds while everyone else is at work. Helicopters and falling leaves count as birds in a pinch. [...]
How To Talk, Part One
February 20th, 2009 · 1 Comment · Humor, Solutions
Once you’re unemployed, people expect that you will talk like a normal laid-off person. There are two sets of rules: those for everyday use and those for interviews. I’ll cover everyday speak here.
Use only exclamations or questions. If you’re writing, repeat punctuation marks. It’s OK to switch back and forth or just focus on one [...]
Tags:funny
Repeated Failure Lands A Job
February 19th, 2009 · No Comments · Humor, New members
To the Editors
The Dead Company Club
Dear Sirs:
Please consider me to be a writer for your blog. I am perfect for the job. Here’s why.
1. I was a corporate chameleon at a company that was the icon of its industry when it was suddenly shut down by the SEC and Department of Injustice. Almost 90,000 people [...]
Eulogy to A Dead Company
February 17th, 2009 · No Comments · Humor
ODE TO THAT WHICH IS NO MO’
The winds of change have mustered strength and slammed us from high above,
They’ve swept the land of all we knew, life changed with a mighty shove.
A top company gone, best of the best, we scratch our heads – much puzzled,
Wanting to rant, blame and curse and yet we still [...]
